|
Sharing Drugs is Natures Peace Pipe |
|
|
|
|
Written by Administrator
|
|
Tuesday, 27 November 2007 |
 Last night I had a dream that I was using cocaine with US President George W. Bush. Actually, at first I was hiding it from him because I didn't want to get into any trouble. But then something strange happened - he began to tell me about other experiences he has had with the drug. It was at that moment that I decided I should be the bigger man and share in my massive quantity of white, powdery, numbness. When I awoke from my dream, I wondered if this is the answer that I've been searching for. Would using illegal narcotics be the secret way for George and I to finally make amends over our differences?
Now, in real life I don't use cocaine. Hell, I don't even take aspirin. I'm not big on the idea of human beings taking most of the chemicals (including caffeine) we use on a daily basis. I'm not trying to be preachy, but if Jesus didn't drink soda, then neither should we. Then again, he was a wino, so it's really hard to use him as a role model, right?
 Anyways, my point is this: Even though I don't take drugs, because of my dream I feel that maybe cocaine might be an icebreaker to talk to the current President. We could sit down like professionals and really discuss what the real problems facing America are. Sure, there's terrorism, anti-conformists, hippies, gay marriages, Mexicans agreeing to take the jobs we're too lazy to do, and Canadians getting all the snow... but what are the BIGGER issues we are dealing with?
It's worth a shot, right? Nothing else seems to do the trick. So, here's my idea: Please, send in all your left over cocaine to the Biggest Letdown website. We'll pile it all up, and invite the President over for dinner. Once he sees that we're not cops and that we all just want to party a little bit, then he'll shovel some heaping spoonfuls down his mouth (is that how you take cocaine? I'm still not sure because the V-chip in my TV won't allow me to watch R-rated movies).
Once we do this, I'll take pictures and maybe videotape the whole engagement and broadcast it on this very website. It's a WIN/WIN situation, folks! Let's all get to know the President!
|
|
Last Updated ( Tuesday, 27 November 2007 )
|
